Dehonest

adj.

The discovery that an apparent truth was in fact a lie. Not to be confused with being Dionest.

"Dan told me that drinks were going to be £1 all night just so I would invite loads of people. Turns out the drinks are £2 - I feel so dehonest!"

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shrinkles

Wrinkles that appear on a woman (usually in the facial region) after significant weight loss.

Mavis: 'ave you seen Doris of late? 'Er shrinkles are 'orrid!
Dorothy: Innit!

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Skledging

Sledging with a skateboard, having removed the wheels.

John: hey dude, you coming sledging?

Bob: sorry dude, ain't got no sledge.

John: just take the wheels off your skateboard, innit. Skledging.

Bob: dude!

Off On One

Behaviour outside the realms of normal, with respect to the individual.

To do one's own thing.

To 'give the birdie' to the world and make a concerted effort to annoy / piss off / offend as many people as possible in a given timeframe.

John: Er... is Calvin off on one?
James: Nope - he usually chases pigeons on his lunchbreak.

James: Woah - does Miranda usually dance on tables whilst inebriated, sans underwear??
John: Nope - she's off on one.

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ninny

Infantile, seemingly British, term for the female genitalia.

"Show me your winkle and I'll show you my ninny"

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Girlfriend Positioning System

The surreptitious use of Google Latitude on your girlfriend's phone so that you can track her whereabouts without her knowing. Tends not to work with technology-proficient girlfriends. Also requires a phone that supports Latitude, but helped by the prevalence of Android, Apple OS and Blackberry phones.

Commonly abbreviated GiPS (pronounced: jips).

John: so Carla's gone out with her friends tonight, huh? Where are they headed?

Bob: she said Misty's but, hang on - my girlfriend positioning system shows an anomaly - why is she in some random street in Hangleton???

John: dude!

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Tethering

The process of connecting your phone to your laptop in order to facilitate an Internet connection. Usually performed via bluetooth or USB.

John: ah crap I can't get a wifi signal on my laptop. Sorry, I can't look up that obscure Pink Floyd track on discogs.com

Bob: dude, one word - tethering.

John: dude!

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