cranial nevernude

A (usually prematurely) balding male who is never seen without a hat, even when temperature, etc., render it absurd, and clings to it for dear life if wind or other circumstances threaten to remove it.

Derived from "nevernude," a reference to the TV show "Arrested Development."

"Dude, shave it, get some plugs, or just own it, don't be a cranial nevernude."

cranial hotpocket

when you shoot someone in the forehead and then shit in the bullet hole.

“quit all that talk before i make your head a cranial hotpocket”