Spider

Spawned from satan's butthole, a close in counter with these creatures are sure to put you into shock for 1 or more hours.

Hey Timmy I saw a house that spontaneously caught on fire in this area do you know who's house it was?

Yeah it was mine

Jesus I'm so sorry man

Don't be I found a nest of spiders in my bedroom and had to take the neccisary steps to cleanse my house.

Ahh ic I jet u man

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Spider

Okay, I can see why people hate black widows...But tarantulas? I mean, yeah, they'll give you a rash if you hold them wrong, but still...

Afraid of a nonpoisonous creature only half an inch long? Okay, that's just sad.

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Spider

Name of a shittiest and dumpiest gay bar in Bratislava, Slovakia, Central Europe with bunch of old pervs staring at you all the time, the place has no air-conditiong and is just a dump!

Boy 1: Ever been to Spider?
(Si bol niekedy v Spideri?)
Boy 2: Fuck no!
(Ti jebe? Ne!)

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Spider

Name of the shittiest and dumpiest gay bar in Bratislava, Slovakia, Central Europe with bunch of old pervs staring at you all the time..eeeew

Boy 1: Si bol niekedy v Spideri? (Ever beeen to Spider?)
Boy 2: Ti jebe? Ne! (Fuck no!)

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Spider

The lines around one's anus. - Also, See "Spokes"

Ouch, lifting that table blew my spider out.

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Spider

Fuck!!!! Those things are creepy as hell.

The cause of childhood terrors.

Mom: oh my goodness, that's the biggest spider I've ever seen.
Me: *packed bags* Fuck it, I'm going to dad's house.

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Spider

"All spiders can block flyers.
All spiders have some green in them.
Unless they are nifty artifact mecha-spiders.
All spiders have toughness greater than their power. Their power is at least 1.
All spiders should cost five or less. And if it's cost is five, the spider should be ridiculous. Four, really, seems like it should be market price for a solid spider, and three for a pretty good one. But definitely not more than five.
All spiders will make the cut in your sealed deck, assuming you are playing Green.
All spiders have the creature type - spider."

-jon becker

Whiplash Spider

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