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When it feels like you have a tennis ball sized rock in your anus and you just want to relieve yourself of it, but when you sit on the toilet and strain it doesn't come out because it's rock hard and your anus cannot stretch wide enough for it to come out without tearing. Also the reason why I have a hemroid that I'm severely self conscious about & I refuse to have sex with anyone until it shrinks.
FUCK! I've had to shit for days but I'm constipated. I almost feel like puking the turd out.
113👍 37👎
The inability to relieve oneself of a 'brown baby'. The opposite of diarrhoea. The thing that killed Elvis. The torture that the eldery suffer most days. Prunes are the only saviour.
"In the name of all that is holy, I've never has so much trouble taking a shit in my life. That was the worst constipation ever."
365👍 170👎
inability to shit
cannot poop
impossible to drop a bomb
Eating too much peanut butter caused me to become constipated.
26👍 9👎
you cannot take a dump because your butthole is messed up at the moment, but you cannot poop for a looong time
ohhh man, I have shat for 2 weeks!
Damn! you must be constipated!
107👍 75👎
A food which is difficult to digest and actually inhibit bowel movements.
Pizza is a constipator. Cheese is difficult to digest and the tomato sauce and the cheese prevent the top side of the dough from being baked.
when you need to take a shit but you cant cus your ass hurts
i need to take a dump but im constipated
58👍 45👎
Constipation, is when Trump, And Kim Jong-Um Are in their, blowing eachother up...
Street name: Trumpster did big boomboom
'Omg, I've had constipation for such a long time now'
'Wow, Donald Gay Trump, And Kim Jung-Um must be fighting/arguing again'
'Yeah.... But this one's lasting a long time!'
'Heh, one time, mine lasted so long, It was the size of a football field when it came out'
'Wow, They fight for that long?'
'Indeed... That's how 911 happened'
'Jee...'
4👍 1👎