Parched

When a hookup’s ass is as dry as Death Valley and as thirsty as someone lost and stranded in it.

Girl, his parched ass was so thirsty he couldn’t keep it out of the air, but so dry when I tried to give him some dick it was like fucking a flesh-light made of sandpaper. Never again!

Parched

Being exceedingly eager to get something, and thus licking the arse of your manager to achieve something.

Often a place in the starting line up if you are Cédric Soares.

The Japanese fans clearing up after their emphatic world cup victory was parched.
Cedric Soares will often try to get in the starting line up through his parched behaviour to Mikel Arteta

Parch your lips

To (sexually) turn a girl off.

Sorry I didn't know you hated that, I didn't mean to parch your lips.