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Random
1: Satan's asshole, usually only to employees.
2: A place for insane individuals with foot fetishes and drooling problems to congregate.
3: A store that quickly turns genuinely nice employees into miserable bastards due to horrible pay, horrible management, and that god awful "do you have a membership?" question.
4: Evidently a library since, more often than not, customers don't actually BUY books.
"Excuse me, how do I borrow books?"
"You don't. This is Barnes and Noble. Go to the library down the block."
"Where's your manager?"
"That's a good question. I haven't seen them myself for the past 4 hours."
"I really like feet. What would I have to do to get you to show me your feet??!"
103👍 40👎
A soul-sucking corporate bookstore. Employees are nice, to an extent, but the higher you go in the company, the less smiles.
Employees must:
1. Always bug you to buy a Member Discount Card.
2. Walk you to every book.
They have a large selection of books, but only on certain subjects. Their website has a far better range of books. Their largest competetor is Borders. CD's and DVD's are overpriced.
Excuse me, can you help me find a book. It was on that table and it had a blue cover.
'Do you have a Barnes and Noble Member Card?'
95👍 38👎
A store that sells over priced books, And gives its self all the credit for wide spread reading in america in the 20th century, in its employee manual.
Whats a library? is that like a barnes and noble?
118👍 68👎
Synonymous with the action of dropping a deuce due to the fact that the Barnes and Noble bathrooms are so well kept up that the famed bookstore is the place to go if one ever needs to pinch a loaf in public.
I shouldn't have had White Castle last night; I really have to drop a Barnes and Noble.
20👍 8👎
A place that will wait until you’ve found something you like, and then make you need to shit violently. You also will not be able to locate the bathroom.
“Hey dude! Come look at this book on the 34th rule of the inter—ah fuck I really need to shit hold on”
“I swear man everyone always needs to shit when they go in Barnes and Noble”
Process to obtain revenge on someone who has damaged your life in a major way. First visit barns and noble's magazine section remove as many of the loose subscription cards as you can carry. Fill in the targets name address ect..rubber stamp is best. Check the boxes for 2 year subscription and bill me. Drop them in the post office drive up drop box. Do this for 100 cards once a week until you feel better. For extra credit look for depends adult diaper ads they have free samples coupons send as many of these as possible. Good luck
That bitch filled a false police report , so i gave her. The Barns and Noble.
any corporate bookstore that contains a starbucks coffee shop.
Jim: "Hey, Ted, i was thinking about going to a Barnes and Nobles to get some Choose Your Own Adventure books."
Ted: "Do you want to go to the one off of Central or the one down by Alice's place?"
Jim: "No, i was thinking about going to the Borders where the movie theater used to be"
Ted: "Really? I didn't know there was a Starbucks in there."
7👍 17👎