Affended

Affirmation + offended. When your negative beliefs of your future become reality and it shatters your ego, you're affended

I was expecting them to reject my job application, but now that it's actually happened, I am so affended. FML

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Child play

When you role-play your children during sex with your spouse

"We love to dress up as clowns and fuck each other's brain out while laughing hysterically. What kinda stuff are you guys into?"
"We're really into child play. We have eight children so it never gets old."