No print no scan

Alternative for “facts”. As in, no print, no scan, just fax.

Pierre: “Predrinks at mine this Friday.”
Farouk: “No print no scan.”
Danilo: “Just fax.”

Bubble bath wrath

Rage experienced particularly by female service-industry workers. Bubble bath wrath is brought on by long days of serving rude customers and prompts the victim to exclaim her need for a bubble bath as soon as she returns home.

After another 11-hour shift at the AT&T booth in the mall, Ashleigh stormed back to her apartment in a fit of bubble bath wrath before eventually calming down in a soapy tub of Himalayan Salts.

Film shrapnel

That one little bit of popcorn that lives between your teeth for three days after you see a film.

I had a sentimental moment today when my tongue finally got that film shrapnel out of my teeth and we said a last goodbye.

Tinder Advent Calendar

Swiping psychotically through Tinder after dinner each night of the holidays to kill time and ensure matches.

Alone in quarantine or bored stiff on their parents' couch, young singles everywhere swipe to the end of their daily allowance, reaping a heinous daily match with a past-prime hometown hottie, or the waiter from the cafe downstairs you've never seen with his mask off. Tinder Advent Calendar matches offer all the short-lived indulgence of the advent chocolates of childhood, but with the added risk of a dick pic.

Harriet's Tinder Advent Calendar currently features Abs Joe from Chem, now a year-round receptionist, and Cute Window Guy who makes ugly infographics on his Instagram.

George W. F. H. Bush

Commando-in-sheets. President of working from home in nothing but a shirt. Gets dressed by invading the Dryrack. Went to Yale but pretends to be from Texas to gain acceptance from his O&G colleagues. Bedroom also known as the Broval Office.

Colleagues on Teams call: "I think you're on mute - we can't hear you."
George W. F. H. Bush: "But I can hear YOU!"

George W. F. H. Bush

The commando-in-chief. President of working from home in nothing but a shirt, gets dressed by invading the Dryrack. Went to Yale but says he's from Texas so his O&G coworkers will accept him.

Coworkers on the Teams call: "I think you're on mute, we can't hear you."
George W. F. H. Bush: "But I can hear you!"

Sky high January

What everyone doing Dry January has secretly started by the middle of the month.

They may not be washing back Buds with Whiskey suds, but don’t be fooled. They’re high as balls.

Ah yes, Leonard and Celine back at their old charade - pushing the wine glasses away as if we didn’t know they’re in full-blown Sky High January mode and smoked three blunts before they came to dinner.