Hazzer

Yiddish term for traif (non kosher) food. Mostly used to refer to ham and bacon.

Tom :Yo Yoni you want a bacon Sarnie?
Yoni: Yeah man pass the hazzer!

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Hook ya in the gabber m8!

British slang for I'll punch you in the mouth.

Hermione "But Ron that chocolate was mine..."
Ron "Ya better shut ya mouth ya cheeky cunt or I swear to christ I'll hook ya in the gabber m8!

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Manchester

Shitey city up north. Full of arrogant twats, chavs, and two faced arseholes. It's extremely dull too, all they've got is a mediocre shopping centre and a football museum. You're far better off going to the vastly superior Liverpool. Despite how shit it is, Mancurians make out it's far better than Liverpool and London. The reason they hate on London and Liverpool so much is because they know how inferior it is so try to bring down their betters, just like a school bully.

Adam:Fuck London man, it's evil! Manchester is clearly the best city!
Brent: Lol you're joking right? Manchesters full of cunts like you! It's gotta be one of the crappest cities I've been too. You're only hating on London coz you know Manchesters a massive shithole!
Adam: That's not true! Manchester's better! You're just jelaous!
Brent: Yeah you keep telling yourself that lol. And anyway, if that's so true why did you move to London?
Adam: Shut up! I'm out of here!

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Video Game Time

The rate of time that passes when playing video games, which is much faster. 10 minutes in Video game time tends to be an hour in real time, although it depends on the game.

Example one
Mum "Timmy where the hell you been all day?"
Timmy"What do you mean? I've only been gaming for an hour."
Mum"Timmy, it's 4pm!"
Timmy" Ah crap I thought it was 10! I guess it was only an hour in video game time."

Example two
Mum "Larry dinners gonna be ready in 10 minutes!"
*A minute of video game time passes*
Mum "Larry come on dinners ready!"

Larry "But it's only been a minute? Ah video game time."

Last Minute Cancel Bullshit

When someone cancels on you last minute with a weak excuse. Very common among flaky people.

Scenario 1:
Brent "Hey Becki I'm almost there."

Becki "Oh sorry Brent, I can't hangout anymore. I have to go shopping with my friends mum"

Brent "Damn it Becki why do you always pull this last minute cancel bullshit!"
Scenario 2:
John"Oh hey Emily, I thought you were going out tonight?"
Emily"Nat pulled some last minute cancel bullshit on me. Said she had to wait in for her sisters parcel!"
John"Well that sucks, sorry mate"

Half Kosher

When a Jew will eat non Kosher meat like beef and chicken, but won't eat a non kosher animal like pork or prawns. Something secular Jews do as they think it's better than fully breaking kosher, when in reality there's no difference.

Don:Hey Emily would you like some of my ham and cheese sandwich?

Emily: No Don! I can't have that! It's not kosher!
Don: Erm, Emily you do know that sandwich you're eating is non kosher chicken right?
Emily: Yeah but I eat non kosher meat, just not non kosher animals.
Don: So you're half kosher.

Two wrongs don't make a right

Something an arsehole whines when you treat them the same way they treat you. Double standards and hypocrisy at it's finest.

Andy:You ate my donut! How dare you!
Brent:Screw you Andy! you always help yourself to my food and leave the damn wrappers in the fridge!
Andy:Yeah well two wrongs don't make a right!
Brent:Andy take your double standards and shove it up your arsehole! Treat people how you want to be treated you selfish hypocrite!

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