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a lesser known branch of mathematics that studies douchebags. Douchenometry deals with the relationship between the modern day douchebag and doucheassery.
Douchenometry should be a mandatory prerequisite class prior to working at any Ed Hardy clothing store.
sample theories
1. douchebagA + douchebagB = 2 too many douchebags in one area
2. The shortest distance between two douchebags is always the other direction
a common yet often preventable medical condition that can occur when a douche is placed in a position that requires thinking beyond the most basic of decisions such as whether or not to get out of bed and what cereal to eat in the morning.
Oh look Jim is suffering from a doucherysm right now. I told him to let the counselor pick his college classes for him, but he never listens
a version of the modern day bro with undeniable good looks, witty sense of humor, and a lady killer aura. It is not advisable to take this type of bro as your wingman unless you yourself can be classified as such, doing so will result in him pulling your chick as well as the three others he scored earlier in the night.
Bro Pitt here tells me that intelligent cultured chicks are easy, guess it's time to hit up the Renaissance fair.
17π 2π
one who has dedicated their life to eviscerating and exterminating known douchebags, often times doing so with hurtful words or slanderous remarks.
Alex is a real douchernator, the way he made fun of those douchebags was legendary to say the least.
10π 1π
a cleverly deceiving type of douchebag that by all outward appearances seems normal, but do not be fooled this type of douchebag has had years to mask his douchiness. When this type of douchebag encounters other douchebags they tend to display douchey behavior.
I never in suspected that Chad was a douche in sheep's clothing, but look at him over there with those douchebags talking about the lastest Ed Hardy shirts and new pokemon games.
13π 3π
an act or acts of jackassery committed by completely douchey people
Tom is up to his usual doucheassery by wearing an Ed Hardy t-shirt and claiming to be a UFC fan
20π 1π
an act of verbally accosting someone to such an extent that the recipient feels as if they have been raped in the most unnatural of ways.
I was forced to commit verbal sodomy when that douchebag was in my face talking shit.
3π 1π