Officer Candidates School

The USMC OCS is located in Quantico, Virginia. This is a place that college students with psychology, sociology, fine arts, philosophy, political science, or some other fucking trivial majors attend every summer to become 'Leaders of Marines'. An alternative path in life for these loosers is pouring coffee at Starbucks.

I lost 40 lbs of muscle, wrote 25 chits, and got a total of 12 hours of sleep in Officer Candidates School this summer!

24👍 37👎

Jeffrey Wright

I very gifted actor. Recently I've checked his filmography and realized that I've seen most of his films an never recognized him.

Jeffrey Wright is a brilliant actor.

12👍 10👎

J.Lo

A heinous mutant with an elephant's ass and an intellect of a door knob. A diva in american pop culture i.e. a paragon of abysmal taste and grotesque cacophony. Exposure and rise to success is a result of diligent fellation.

Is that a cello?
No, it's J.Lo.

338👍 163👎

syriana

A long-forgotten 2005 Academy Award winning geo-politcal thriller which won Jorge Clooney his Oscar. A captivating drama exploring America's lust for oil by connecting several plot lines. Unfortunately a typical American is too stupid to follow it flips the channel to TRL.

Syriana is a movie made by Terrorists.

34👍 27👎

doom 3

A proven cure for constipation.

Doom 3 is one spooky motherfucking game.

163👍 23👎

M-16

U.S. military's proud gas operated, air cooled, light weight, hand held piece of shit. It is very sensitive to all elements that you'd find outdoors, including air and sunshine. It jams if fly shit gets into the bolt so essentially it's not much of a infantry weapon. It must be cleaned constantly to be able to fire a full magazine, and after that it needs more maintanence. To extend a grunt's life on the battlefield, the A2 variant isn't fully automatic, so there will be some time between dissasembly and cleaning. The reason it became standard issue in the U.S. military is because in the 1960's Colt executives bought some high ranking military brass a few beers and lapdances. Other than that, there's no reason why a recognized military would adopt such garbage.

PFC.Smith:"Hey Jones, i can't open this beer!"
PFC.Jones:"Use the ejection port on your M-16, stupid."

99👍 94👎

russian

A person born in Russia.
Men-cool, funny, but real assholes when drunk. Not too handsome in most cases, tend to suffer from acne and bad breath. All of them smoke and drink.

Women-cool, funny, alot are attractive, unless they have Jewish heritage, and most don't let themelves get fat. They act proper, don't appreciate fowl language, modest, but will fuck your brains out if you're liked. Typically a handshake and an eye contact guarantees sex, but if you're not liked then you'll know right away. They don't act like sluts, but love fucking. Why not? All smoke and drink.

Tom:"Damn, that skinny kid has alot of zits!"
Dan:"Yeah, he must be Russian."

95👍 467👎