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Kids

The aftermath of a frat party after you took some X and thought you were superman so no mere mortal women could ever conceive you baby.

Trippin Boy: Listen! my sperm is like too powerful for you so like it cant get you like pregnant ya know

Drunk Girl: MMMMMMKAYYYY!!!

(12 months, 2 kids, and 3 heart attacks later)

Not so drunk mom: hey super man wheres my welfare check?

Not so trippy boy: let me just go to krypton and..... PEACE!!

by Enatap Ynohtna February 23, 2010

89๐Ÿ‘ 44๐Ÿ‘Ž


This Kid

used when refering to a human entity during conversation or after performing an exceptional human entity activity, can be used in third person

Did this kid just finish his 5 page philosophy paper?

This kid just got himself a new pair of Nike Shox!

by Tom Sean April 22, 2003

25๐Ÿ‘ 10๐Ÿ‘Ž


Kidded

The action of hitting something with an infant or small child

I kidded that disappointment of a child yesterday

by Tekita rain May 3, 2019


for the kids

Another way of saying "for the boys" but instead of doing it for the boys do it for the kids

come on do it for the kids\

by Gball boys November 9, 2017

7๐Ÿ‘ 1๐Ÿ‘Ž


kid

Whenever your kids are out of control, you can take comfort from the thought that even God's omnipotence did not extend to his kids. After creating heaven and earth, God created Adam and Eve.

And the first thing God said to them was: "Don't."

"Don't what?" Adam asked.

"Don't eat the forbidden fruit", said God.

"Forbidden fruit? Really? Where is it?" Adam and Eve asked, jumping up and down excitedly.

"It's over there," said God, wondering why he hadn't stopped after making the elephants.

A few minutes later God saw the kids having a forbidden fruit break and he was very angry.

"Didn't I tell you not to eat that fruit?" the First Parent asked.

"Uh huh," Adam replied.

"Then why did you do it?" God asked exasperatedly.

"I dunno," Adam answered.

God's punishment was that Adam and Eve should have children of their own.

Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed. But there is a reassurance in this story. If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give your children wisdom and they haven't taken it, don't be so hard on yourself. If God had trouble handling his children, what makes you think it should be a piece of cake for you?

Kids are the flowers of life ... on their parents' graves.

by alvit May 17, 2009

26๐Ÿ‘ 11๐Ÿ‘Ž


kids

the one thing that keeps you going knowing as long as you treat them as individual people they will always respect you.

my kids are my reason for living

by mamajoey June 19, 2008

171๐Ÿ‘ 105๐Ÿ‘Ž


kids

Children, offspring, those under 21 living in your household.

I don't want any kids, instead I'm going to adopt my Albertsons' staff and have them move into my multi-million dollar mansion.

by Saints September 30, 2003

164๐Ÿ‘ 103๐Ÿ‘Ž