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n. An excessively impacted bowel movement which produces painful anal fissures when voided.
"My Doctor informed me the problem was most likely schnatter related due to complications arising from bad pizza and a crappy health plan."
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In reference to Papa John AKA John Schnatter, not having had his day of reckoning to this day.
Synonym to get rekt
Man this fella just kicked my ass in the bar, I got schnattered in there
When a girl's face straight up looks like Papa John's founder John Schnatter, no matter how killer her body is.
"That girl has a a sick booty but she got a wicked case of John Schnatter-face!"
The act of soiling one's self after consuming low quality chain store pizza.
Philip: "Oh no, I ate Papa John's, and now I have the bubble guts!"
Gwendolyn: "Fuck, Philip! Don't Schnatter yourself in my Elantra!"