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When one drink is too many, and a thousand aren't enough.
If an alcoholic just doesn't have that first next one, they are on the right track. That first one is the killer.
1746👍 280👎
Someone who drinks in the shower.
That motherfucker was drinking a keystone in the shower. That motherfucker is an alcoholic.
146👍 28👎
A person who always feels two drinks behind.
"I just woke up, how can I already be two drinks behind?"
or
"Alcoholic? What's that?"
209👍 48👎
A person who knows exactly how many days it's been since they had a drink.
E.g., In January, 2007, Lindsay Lohan told People magazine "I haven't had a drink in seven days. Or anything." Lindsay Lohan's publicist Leslie Zelnick confirmed to The Associated Press in December that Lohan was attending Alcoholics Anonymous meetings.
437👍 146👎
A true Alcoholic would rather drink, then get a Blowjob.
Bills wife was getting ready to go down on him, but Bill said no, I'll take a double jack n coke instead.
930👍 331👎
A person who can't stop drinking once he/she's started. Also known as an alkie.
Damn, Joe's already put away five beers, and it's only been five minutes! What an alcoholic!
111👍 40👎