myrmecology

Myrmecology is the study of ants - A myrmecologist studies ants.

"When I grow up, I want to be a myrmecologist, mummy."
"What's a mymecologist?"
"It's somebody who partakes in myrmecology."
"Oh, right - yeah, cool."

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nativity play

A play about a ridiculous thing that was COMPLETELY blown out of proportion. Basically, Mary cheats on Joseph with a guy who could have been called Tony. She can't bear the thought of A)Upsetting her husband B)Being stoned to death by an excited crowd of civilians, on account of comitting adultary. So, she takes her chances and tells the gullable Joseph that God came down from the heavens and did the dirty on her, resulting in Mary being pregnant with the so-called "son of god". For generations and generations, this far-fetched story has been passed on, and more and more gullable people have been persuaded that Jesus was the son of a virgin. C'mon guys. Let's be realistic here.

-Oh Joseph, I'm...I'm...I'm pregnant!
-WHAT? BUT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE A BLOODY VIRGIN! YOU SLEPT WITH THAT TONY DIDN'T YOU!? I KNEW THERE WAS SOMETHING GOING ON! WAIT TILL THE NEIGHBOURS HEAR ABOUT THIS!
-No! erm (think Mary, think!) Er...well, yeah...erm...IT WAS GOD WHAT DONE IT!
-WOW! Are you serious?
-Yeah!
-Do you know how holy this makes us, Mary? It's a miracle! What are we gonna call the baby?
-Jesus?
-Perfect. Jesus, Mary and Joseph. What a family, eh?!

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tyrophillia

The love of cheese.

See also tyrophagia and tyrophobia

Being a tyrophilliac, married life is becoming rather tedious. I come home from work, exhausted and hungry, and all I want is a piece of fresh stilton. I make my way to the fridge, only to find my husband lying on the kitchen floor, twitching and gurgling "Des...troy..th-the..ch...eeeeese..." Kicking him away, I open the fridge to discover that all my best stilton had been covered in weedkiller and athlete's foot powder. I should have known not to marry a someone with tyrophobia I want a divorce.

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bore

Meaning "to stab", with a "borer" (rude-boy terminology meaning sharp, dangerous object, usually a knife)

Watch, I'm gonna bore you up.

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other

A word that describes anything apart from the subject being discussed at the time.

"Would you like this Barbie for your birthday?"
"No, I'd like the other one."

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cup-drink

Cup drinks are tasty, convenient and colourful. They come in bright pink (raspberry), bright blue, bright orange and many other colours. They come with a straw that has a sharp point at one end. One of the best things about having a cup drink is grabbing the straw and enthusiastically stabbing it through the plastic lid. Cup drinks bring happiness to the world. Indeed, I am partly named after Cup Drink, my name being "Cup-Sellithaine". My cool mate Clare Atkinson is also partly named after Cup Drink, and her name is Rasthangatas-Drink

"Excuse me, We're really thirsty...Do you have a spare 20 pence piece so we can buy two cup drinks for 10p each?"

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kylie minogue

A beautiful, bubbly, intelligent, minature lady who has a big smile and a cheery voice.

"Part of me is a sexual exhibitionist."
(she's not afraid to be sexual, but this does not make her a slut. Sexuality is something that was taken off the "taboo list" aaaages ago.)

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